Get Money with Lil Wayne.
We've noticed a bizarre snacking trend of late: Companies are obsessively trying to one-up each other with the complex flavors and powders they use to flavor their snack foods with.
Two such examples we've personally tried in recent weeks: 7-Eleven's hot dog chips, which quite accurately capture the subtle nuances of burnt wiener, slightly stale bun and hints of mustard and ketchup; and Combos' 7-layer dip flavor, which manages to pack in the flavor profiles of seven unique dip layers into a tiny amount of filling.
Is it a bit, like something from Idiocracy? Maybe.
But it's also kind of amazing if you're ever feeling a bit adventurous/gluttonous.
Still, every now and then, somebody takes the concept a step too far: Take the Japanese, who for instance recently released Pepsi-flavored Cheetos.
Take a moment.
Re-read that last bit if you have too.
It's crazy.
Anyway, early reviews seem to indicate the chips do, indeed, taste like a fusion of the two snack items. While we're not doubting the truth of those claims, we would still like to ask why these things exist in the first place? Unfortunately, like finding out the number of licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop, it's something we just may never know.
What we are sure of is that there is quite a bit going on this weekend.
Friday
Kim Lenz at Double Wide
Back in 2009, a reviewer for Rolling Stone raved: “If Elvis had been a woman, he probably would have sounded just like Kim Lenz.” With that being said, who better to party with on the 36th anniversary of The King's death? If that weren't enough, Dallas rockers GIRL will be opening the show with 13 Elvis covers. — Cory Graves
Eleven Hundred Springs at Granada Theater
Outlaw-country traditionalists Eleven Hundred Springs bring their new-school look and decidedly old-school sound to the Granada for a show opened by the Possum Posse and Shiny Ribs. Don't let the tattoos fool you: The headliners aren't some sort of nouveau alt-country thing; they would've been right at home opening for Waylon Jennings or Johnny Cash. — Stephen Young
America's Most Wanted Festival Featuring Lil Wayne at Gexa Energy Pavilion
It's been a big summer for hip-hop already. So far, we've seen huge amounts of hoopla caused by the likes of Yeezus, Jay-Z, A$AP Rocky and even Lil B. This one's the lineup we've all been waiting for, though, as Lil Wayne brings the best of the bunch to Gexa for this fest. Each of the artists on this bill cover just about every niche in popular hip-hop, from that Atlanta hustlin' drawl (T.I.) to white boy lady killers (G-Eazy) and even rap-rockers (Wayne himself). Better get there early so you don't miss out. — Zoe Mattioli
MC Chris at Cambridge Room
American nerdcore rapper MC Chris is perhaps best known for his infamous MC Pee Pants character on the Adult Swim's Aqua Teen Hunger Force. Pee Pants is a mentally insane rapper who wears a shower cap and diaper, so what's not to love? MC Chris' trademark is his high-pitched voice and his lyrics involving robotripping and his penchant for being a “nerd gangster.” Let your geek flag fly. We won't judge. — Nicole Arnold
Dark Rooms at The Foundry
The band behind the best local album of the year so far brings its moody, seductive, synth-driven sound to Oak Cliff's The Foundry for a free show. The album's less than $8, so use the money you're saving on the cover fee tonight to buy the album. — Stephen Young
Fourth Anniversary Concert Feat. Jonathan Tyler and the Northern Lights at Trees
Trees celebrates its 2009 reopening with a soiree featuring rockers Jonathan Tyler and the Northern Lights (who you should expect to be working on some new material at this one), plus fellow locals J. Charles & The Trainrobbers. Tickets for the show are just $4. — SY
Sphynx, Sealion, Savage and the Big Beat at Dan's Silverleaf
The first time we saw Austin synth-punks Sphynx come through Dallas, it was the summer of 2011 and the primary reason we caught there set was thanks to a text message that simply read, “Wherever you are, get here now.” The heavily electro-leaning dance-punk trio definitely warranted this kind of prompting: Ridiculous spandex outfits, choreographed dance moves, an incredible drummer and a guitarist who has developed a technique in which he yells directly into his guitar's pickups are all extraordinarily memorable parts of this band's set. — CG
The King Bucks at Sundown
As polished and high-gloss as their two studio albums sound, the Bucks' real bread and butter is the oft-whiskey-fueled rowdiness of their live shows, plus their power to give any club — or in this case, restaurant — the feel of a smoke-filled honky tonk. — CG
Ninja-Pa-Luau at House of Blues
Last time the Graceland Ninjaz were in town, the self-proclaimed “King of Party Bands” were rolling with a “Ninjas vs Zombies” party concept. This time? They're going with a Ninjas + Luau thing. It's probably one of those things you just have to see to get. — CG
Going Postal at RE gallery
One of the artist whose works can be viewed as part of this exhibition of “diverse postal art production, processes and materials” is definitely a man after our own heart: Gary Farrelly likes to send his pieces through the postal system sans envelope or standard postal packaging, thereby exposing it to “bureaucratic and procedural molestation.” Hey, we get it: Sending unconventional items through the mail sans traditional packaging has long been a fascination of ours, too. — Cory Graves
Saturday
My Bloody Valentine at Verizon Theatre
Loveless is an enduring and almost perfect classic. Its long-, long-awaited followup m b v is really, really good, too. The two albums alone are enough reason to run, not walk, to see seminal Irish shoegazers My Bloody Valentine. The fact that they rarely tour — and even more rarely come to Dallas — is just more incentive. Go see the band every noise/garage/post-punk/shoegaze band for the last quarter-century has tried — and subsequently failed — to sound like. Just don't forget earplugs. — SY
Kevin Hart's Plastic Cup Boyz at House of Blues
If you're looking to see Kevin Hart do some stand up tonight, keep on looking. The name of this one is more literal than that. But if hearing members of his entourage and former tour mates is somehow more your speed, this show might still be worth your time. The trio of performers includes Joey Wells, Will “Spank” Horton and Na'im Lynn. — JP
Rotting Out at Rubber Gloves
Proud carriers of the Los Angeles hardcore mantle, Rotting Out comes to Denton as part of the tour for their May-released The Wrong Way LP. You know this one will be loud. That's just a given considering the band/genre. In the case of Rotting Out, though, expect the sheer volume to be accompanied by a ton — and we mean a ton — of energy. Take Offense, Minus, Relentless and Dead in the Dirt Open. Is it just us, or does that lineup sound like the field for the world's most macabre horse race? Oh, it is? OK then. — SY
Dwight Yoakam at Billy Bob's Texas
The country icon and current torch-bearer for the Buck Owens-pioneered Bakersfield sound will be doing his thing out in Fort Worth. Don't miss the opportunity to enjoy one of the genre's most beloved figure's as he performs at the region's most legendary honky tonks. — CG
SonStock at Sons of Hermann Hall
Celebrate the 44th anniversary of Woodstock — at least we hope it's celebrating Woodstock '69 and not Woodstock '99 — at Sons of Hermann Hall. Events include an extended open-mic session, a plethora of vendors and a “hippiest” costume contest. The fact that it's a hippy costume contest and not a breaking-shit contest means you're probably in pretty good shape as far as the '69 or '99 thing goes. Nevertheless, if you hear Limp Bizkit music at any point, you should probably get the hell out of there. — SY
Keith Urban at Gexa Energy Pavilion
What is that you say? The reigning king of pop country is from Australia? Huh? His 29 charting singles in the US are a pretty good indicator that the genres fans aren't as xenophobic as we might have imagined. If we were lesser writers, we might say something like “Keith Urban: Australian for pop country” here, but we're guessing he's about as tired of those jokes as Paul Hogan is of people asking him whether or not things are knives. — CG
English Premier League Matchday One (Opening Day) at Trinity Hall
Ever been to Trinity Hall at Mockingbird Station for a soccer match? If you haven't — or, hell, even if have — today's one of the best days of the year to check it out. Enjoy seven matches — the first kicks off at 6:45 a.m. — in addition to the pub's great breakfast menu as your excuse to drink Guinness all morning. What more do you need? — SY
Ride For Dime at Trees
This annual charity ride benefiting charities once near and dear to fallen Pantera guitarist “Dimebag” Darrell Abbott gets kicked off at 3:33 p.m. at Longhorn Harley Davidson in Grand Prairie. The parade will pass by Dimebag's old house as well as the gates of the cemetery in which he now rests on the way to the night's metal show. — CG
Assassins at Three Links
As it turns out, punk pioneers the Nervebreakers — who just played Dada last month — aren't the only one of Dallas' seminal punk acts playing reunion shows and working on new albums. Re-formed '80s rockers Assassins headline this hard-rocking bill. — CG
The Phuss at The Where House
Before they take part in the Elm Street Tattoo Convention taking place next month in Deep Ellum, catch hard-edged rockers The Phuss in the low-key, anything goes-style confines of this semi-DIY Fort Worth spot. Dallas country-tinged acts Madison King and The Jack Kerowax open. — CG
Sunday
Betrayal, King Conquer at Sons of Hermann Hall
Death metal, anyone? Betrayal and King Conquer front a heavy bill at Sons of Hermann that also features Aegaeon, Seeker and Through Sleeping Sight. It's a lineup worth checking out if you need to thrash the pain away, or maybe if you just been hearing a little too well lately. — SY
Rear Window at Sherlock's Baker St. Pub & Grill
Each Sunday this month, Sherlock's is screening a different Hitchcock film, and tonight they're showing Rear Window. The suspense flick, which changed the way future filmmakers thought of character perspective, is one of our personal faves. If that's not enough, just know this: Grace Kelly is in this one, and she's pretty incredible. Test your skills and see if you can spot where Hitchcock puts himself into this one. — JP
Sharam's Pool Party at Ku De Ta
International house DJ/producer Sharam spins poolside at the membership-based East Dallas hangout today. While the barside cabana claims memberships can't be purchased, we're sure if you ask around you've got at least a friend of a friend with an in here. Just remember, if you do find your way in to this one: The dress code is “beach chic” and they ask that you don't bring your own towels. — CG
“DallasSites: Charting Contemporary Art, 1963 to Present” at Dalals Museum of Art
It was exciting news earlier this year when the Dallas Museum of Art announced its ambitious summer exhibition, “DallasSITES: Charting Contemporary Art, 1963 to Present.” After all the recent talk surrounding Dallas's viability as an internationally competitive city in terms of visual art, it seemed like the show might serve a culmination of sorts. But when the exhibit finally opened, it actually told a good deal more than originally expected. The title is apt, to say the least — “DallasSITES” maps out the history of contemporary art, categorizing movements and happenings by neighborhood over the course of about 50 years. Be sure to catch it before it closes today. — Elaine Sun
Pizzicatto Porno at The Margo Jones Theatre
For just the second time only, you've got a chance to catch Danielle Georgiou and Justin Locklear's dance-centric multimedia performance, which chronicles the ups and downs of a relationship through the use of video, dance and acting. Check out photographer Karlo X. Ramos' photos of the intimate debut performance here. —CG