Lo and Behold.

Recently, a man in Oakland was trapped between two buildings for four hours before rescuers could free him. How did he get in that predicament, you ask? He was reportedly trying to jump across the buildings in an attempt to woo a lady.

How silly. A much safer and more convenient method of wooing your potential suitor tonight would be with your vast knowledge of the evening’s goings on. That, my friends, you can find below.

An Evening With Werner Herzog at Winspear Opera House
The man behind Grizzly Man and about 50 other films — including his just-released doc about the magic of the internet — will be in town to speak at length about his own genius. Hopefully, at some point, he also makes mention of the tough-as-nails/dickhead director Entourage character he also inspired.

Literal Cats at RBC (Free)
Not literally cats, this is host Clint Werth’s new recurring stand-up comedy show. This go-round, Tyler Simpson, Aj Faji, DDT and Brad LaCour will be the joke-teller on hand. Or maybe just their cats? I’m literally not sure.

Uncle Acid & the Deadbeats at Trees
In a few weeks, Black Sabbath will roll through town, reportedly for the last time ever. Thus, moving forward, it’ll be up to bands like scuzzy Brit rockers — and former Sabbath opening act — Uncle Acid to carry on the mantle.

Steel Magnolias Movie Party at Alamo Drafthouse (Richardson)
Now that you’re older and have better insurance, you’ll probably better appreciate this simultaneously v funny and v sad flick. On the plus side, though, Dolly Parton!

Cory Morrow, Dalton Domino at Capital Bar
Thanks to the help of compatriots of guys like Pat Green, Cory Morrow’s carved out a niche for himself as one of the Texas country scene’s elder statesmen. Tonight he holds court in the Fort with next-big-thing Dalton Domino.

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