On Tap: Deep Ellum, 3 Nations, Four Corners & Nine Band.

We Interrupt Your Regularly Scheduled ‘On Tap’ Review For A Hijacking — A Taste Testing Of Local Beers By An Avid Beer-Hater.

Welcome to On Tap! Each week in this recurring feature, we’ll take an in-depth look at one of the many beers available in the crowded North Texas brew scene. The goal here is to look at these area beers without our local goggles on, and to wonder aloud, “Is this beer good or do I just like it because it’s local?” Let’s find out! Cheers!

Typically, our beer connoisseur Bob Floyd writes these reviews. However, he had to take this week off to attend to other business. Editing On Tap, I’m always amazed at how knowledgable and meticulous Bob is when it comes to all the technicalities of beer — especially since it’s so icky.

I’m a beer hater. My palate is simply not built for it. I’ve tried only a couple of beers and hated them both, so I thought to take the opportunity of Bob’s absence to hijack On Tap and try to expand my horizons a little. I picked up some cans and gave each my review — hoping that at least one of them will be the beer for me.

My ratings won’t be included in our official ranking list, as I have no idea what I’m talking about and don’t want to skew the work laid by the beer writers of Central Track past and present.

To the breweries being reviewed today, sorry in advance.

And fear not, the normal On Tap will be back next week.

This week I sipped on beers from Deep Ellum Brewery, Nine Band Brewing Co., Four Corners Brewing Co. and 3 Nations Brewing.

Deep Ellum Brewing’s Decadence Pilsner

Style: German Pilsner
ABV: 5%
International Bitterness Units (IBUs): 25
Color: light golden
Availability: Taproom

This beer is a special one as it was brewed for the DEB’s 10th anniversary. It’s taproom-only and available for a limited time, but the folks at DEB were sweet enough to send us a box of the stuff for the holidays and to celebrate the anniversary — which makes what I’m about to say all the more painful. DEB, remember that we love you.

This was vile to my baby palate. For beer enjoyers, it’s “super crushable” — brewed with Grüngeist hops and German malts, making it crisp and light. There are also lemon and nectarine flavors.

I drank this on New Year’s Eve, attempting to crush it but have to use a spiced apple Truly as a chaser (the lamest sentence anyone has ever said.) I got about three-quarters of the way before giving up. I got the hint of bright citrus which was nice — especially in the aroma — but it was extremely bitter to me (at only 25 IBUs) and the bread-y taste messed with me too much. I think sipping on straight-up vodka would’ve been easier for me — that’s how much beer is not my jam.

Rest assured though, my family and friends were into it. The search for a Frances-approved beer surges on.

Score

Unfortunately, a 2.

Nine Band’s 28th State Stout

Style: Stout — oatmeal
ABV: 5.6%
International Bitterness Units (IBUs): 23
Color: black
Availability: ??? I found it at World Market.

When trying to visit the website for this Allen brewery, I learned that the owner committed fraud murdered someone. The place is currently closed, but some HGTV stars bought the brewery last summer and will give it a new life, which should start anytime now.

The murder beer is brewed with oatmeal and flaked barley. The aroma of it was really nice — initially giving off strong chocolate and then fading into a coffee scent. I could taste those notes as well when I gave it a sip, giving espresso martini vibes — but not as good. It’s that sour bread taste I just can’t get over. I never put spoiled milk in my coffee, but I feel like it would taste like this.

The beer is super opaque and dark, with a light brown froth. Shining a light through it produced a deep amber color.

It also had a grassy after taste –whatever that means. This beer was a smoother drink than the previous, though I still couldn’t manage to get the glass down.

Score

4 — If I was desperate to get drunk, I could do it.

Four Corners Brewing Co.’s Local Buzz

Honey Rye Golden Ale: cute bee, not a good smell typical beer smell, promised floral smell but can’t detect, rye is strong like liquid bread, most “beery” can’t detect any notes like the previous two, light carbonation, golden, little cloudy leaves me feeling thirsty, 1

Style: golden ale
ABV: 5.2%
International Bitterness Units (IBUs): 20
Color: gold
Availability: year round.

Brewed with a malt base, some Munich, rye malt and a bunch of locally-sourced honey. There were a couple of Four Corners options on the shelf, but to be honest I picked this one because of the bee on the can.

There was a promised floral scent but I sniffed and sniffed and could’t detect it. My notes described the smell as “not a good smell.” This was the most beer-y one, from the aroma to the taste. The rye was very upfront and left me feeling thirsty after drinking it. The honey wasn’t strong enough for me to be able to detect it. Despite having the lowest IBU, it still tasted extremely bitter to me. 

Appearance-wise, there’s a slight cloudiness, light carbonation and a pretty gold color. Overall, it tasted like something I shouldn’t be putting in my body.

Score

Another 2.

3 Nations Brewing’s Mango Smash

Style: smash IPA
ABV: 6.9%
International Bitterness Units (IBUs): 70
Color: gold
Availability: can and on tap

I was most excited to try this tropical IPA from this Carrolton brewery because I’m a hoe for mango and anything else tropical. There’s also an elephant on the can whose aura I found very relatable.

When cracking into this, you immediately get hit with the scent of fresh mango and it’s amazing. Once it subsided, I took a sip, my hopes set high by the amazing smell. Unfortunately, it didn’t taste as good as it smelled. It had sort of a burnt taste, and while I could detect the citrus and mango flavors, they weren’t as strong as I had hoped for.

Interestingly, I thought the bitterness was on par with everything else I sampled, despite the IBUs being at a 70. I really wanted to like this, but alas, an IPA that tastes like a smoothie was not a realistic expectation.  I did buy a pack of this, so maybe I can learn to like it with a few more tries.

Score

3.5 — an extra half a point for smelling so divine. And with a heavy heart, I report that I did not find the beer for me, but I welcome any suggestions.

All photos by Frances Tingle.

Previous On Tap Reviews:

• Revolver’s Sangre y Miel: 10.
• Lakewood Brewing’s Salted Caramel Temptress: 10.
• Peticolas’ Royal Scandal: 10.
• Community’s Mosaic IPA: 10.
• Deep Ellum Brewing Company’s Freak Flag: 10.
• Peticolas’ Velvet Hammer: 10.
• Collective Brewing Project’s Boysenbarrel: 10.
• Community’s Barrel-Aged Legion: 10.
• Community’s Legion: 10.
• Martin House River Horse: 9.75.
• Four Bullets’ What Are the Odds: 9.5.
• BrainDead’s Fill in the Blancs: 9.5.
• Oak Highlands’ Freaky Deaky: 9.5.
• 903 Brewers’ Birthday Sasquatch: 9.5.
• TUPPS Brewery’s Full Grown Scallywag: 9.5.
• On Rotation’s Flocculation of Seagulls: 9.5.
• Braindead Brewing’s P-Wing: 9.5.
• Lakewood Brewing Company’s Coconut Temptress: 9.5.
• Deep Ellum’s Barrel Aged Four Swords: 9.5.
• Lakewood’s Saint Dymphna: 9.5.
• Peticolas’ Lost Epic: 9.5.
• Community’s Ascension Porter: 9.5.
• Lakewood’s Temptress: 9.5.
• Lakewood’s Goatman: 9.5.
• Community’s Public Ale: 9.5.
• Peticolas’ Thrilla in Brazilla: 9.5.
• Collective Brewing Project’s SMaSHY: 9.25
• BrainDead Brewing’s Galactic Federation of Might: 9.25
• On Rotation’s Lingonberry Sahti: 9.25.
• Martin House Brewing Company’s The Morrigan: 9.25.
• On Rotation’s Jalapeno Saison: 9.
• Woodcreek’s Bourbon Barrel Bock: 9.
• Manhattan Project Beer Company’s Christmas Coalition: 9
• Peticolas’ Same Time Next Year: 9.
• Lakewood’s Double Chocolate Temptress: 9.
• Braindead Brewing Company’s Dr. Dreipricot: 9.
• Manhattan Project’s Black Matter: 9.
• Lakewood’s Wild Manimal: 9.
• Manhattan Project Beer Company’s Necessary Evil: 9.
• Revolver’s Blood & Honey: 9.
• Funky Picnic’s Funny Accent: 9.
• Martin House’s Imperial Texan: 9.
• Division Brewing’s Smokin’ Jack-o’s: 9.
• Community Beer Co.’s Medical Grade Haze: 9.
• Wild Acre’s Mondlift: 9.
• Community’s Trinity Tripel: 9.
• Outfit Brewing’s Cole: 9.
• Peticolas’ Irish Goodbye: 9.
• Four Corners’ Block Party Porter: 9.
• Bankhead Brewing Co.’s Giggle Water: 9.
• Cedar Creek’s Belgian Dubbel: 9.
• Manhattan Project’s Wise Monkeys: 9.
• Cedar Creek’s Poblano Paradise: 8.75.
• Rahr & Sons Brewing Company’s Oktoberfest: 8.75.
• Lakewood Brewing Company IPA: 8.75.
• Small Brewpub’s Black Pepper Pils: 8.5.
• Peticolas’ Ghost Of Alfred Brown: 8.5.
• Deep Ellum’s Easy Peasy IPA: 8.5.
• Community Beer Company’s Passiflora: 8.5.
• Deep Ellum’s Oak Cliff Coffee Ale: 8.5.
• Community Beer Company’s Wit ‘N Wild: 8.5.
• Lakewood’s Rock Ryder: 8.5.
• Rahr’s Bourbon Barrel Aged Winter Warmer: 8.5.
• Lakewood’s Raspberry Temptress: 8.5.
• Peticolas’ Prime Minister: 8.25.
• Rahr & Sons Brewing Company’s Winter Warmer: 8.25.
• Noble Rey Brewing’s Barampus: 8.25.
• Martin House’s Possum Kingdom Pilsner: 8.25.
• Community Beer Company’s Brett’s Get It On: 8.25.
• Bankhead Brewing Company’s Aoogah!: 8.25.
• Lakewood’s Peach Artsy Tarsty: 8.25.
• Peticolas Brewing Company’s Clandestine: 8.
• Lakewood Brewing Grand Allowance: 8.
• HopFusion Ale Works’ Hairpin: 8
• Peticolas’ Golden Opportunity: 8
• Three Nations’ Devout (Mexican Chocolate): 8
• White Rock Brewing Co.’s White Rock IPA: 8
• Peticolas Brewing Company’s Worth the Wait: 8
• Collective Brewing Project’s Cup O’ Sumpin Raspberry Lemonade: 8.
• Texas Ale Project’s Smash Experiment: 8.
• Armadillo Ale Works’ Greenbelt Farmhouse Ale: 8.
• Hop & Sting Brewing Company’s Dixon’s Dunkelweizen: 8.
• Cedar Creek Brewery’s Gone A-Rye: 8.
• Panther Island’s Road Trip Snacks: 8.
• Community’s Texas Helles: 8.
• Pegasus City Brewery’s Don Law Brown Ale: 8.
• On Rotation’s Moar Blackberry: 8.
• Franconia’s Silver Star Bock: 8
• Manhattan Project Beer Co.’s Oktoberfest: 8.
• Rahr & Sons Brewing Company’s Paleta de Mango: 8.
• Peticolas Brewing Company’s Doctor’s Orders: 8.
• Hop & Sting Brewing Company’s Galactic Haze: 8.
• Lakewood’s Thread Spinner: 8.
• Bishop Cider Co.’s Sour Cherry: 8.
• Texas Ale Project 50 Ft. Jackrabbit: 8.
• Cedar Creek Brewery’s Gone A-Rye: 8.
• Pegasus City Brewing’ Nine Volt: 8.
• Texas Ale Project’s Payne Pils: 8.
• Noble Rey’s Bridesmaid’s Tears: 8.
• Collective Brewing’s Urban Funk House: 8.
• Pegasus City Brewery’s Cannoneer: 8.
• Pegasus City Brewery’s Sixth Floor: 8.
• Lakewood’s All Call: 8.
• Windmills Brewery’s Cole’s Porter: 8.
• Oak Highlands’ Golden Mustache: 8.
• 903 Brewers’ Crackin’ Up: 8.
• Deep Ellum’s Play Date: 8.
• Rahr & Sons Brewing Company’s 11th Anniversary Russian Imperial Stout: 8.
• Bitter Sisters’ Belgian Tripel: 8.
• Noble Rey’s SteamPunk: 8.
• 903 Brewers’ Citra On Top: 8.
• 3 Nations’ Switchyard: 8.
• TUPPS’ DDH IPA Series 16: 8.
• Bitter Sisters’ Hissy Fit: 8.
• BrainDead’s Gritz: 8.
• Community’s Barrel-Aged Inspiration : 8.
• Cedar Creek’s Fisticuffs: 8.
• Lakewood’s Punkel: 8.
• Four Corners’ El Chingon IPA: 8.
• New Main Brewing’s Thundersnow: 8.
• Martin House’s Day Break: 8.
• Deep Ellum’s GOURDzilla: 8.
• Peticolas’ The Duke (Aged 12 Months): 8.
• Deep Ellum’s Neato Bandito: 8.
• Steam Theory’s Hops Against Humanity: 8
• Revolver’s Bock: 8.
• 903 Brewers’ Sasquatch: 8.
• Peticolas’ Wintervention: 8.
• Division Brewing’s Distant Cousin: 8.
• Armadillo Ale Works’ Brunch Money: 8.
• Martin House’s Salsa Verde: 8.
• Cedar Creek’s Spinning Mule Robust Porter: 8.
• Lakewood’s Holiday Bonus: 8.
• Lakewood’s Hop Trapp: 8.
• Pegasus City Brewery’s The Woofus: 7.75
• Four Corners Brewing Company Homie Brew: 7.75.
• Community Beer Company’s Snickerdoodle: 7.75.
• Pegasus City Brewery’s High Point: 7.75.
• Cedar Creek’s Grapefruit Haze: 7.75.
• Martin House Brewing’s Big Hoppa: 7.75.
• TUPPS Full Grown Man: 7.75.
• 3 Nations American Wit: 7.75.
• Armadillo Ale Works’ Dapper Apple: 7.75.
• 903 Brewers’ Kilt Switch: 7.5.
• Chimera Dirty Dog: 7.5.
• 3 Nations Brewing Company’s Imperial Milk Stout: 7.5.
• Legal Draft’s Accused Amber Lager: 7.5.
• Grapevine’s Reserve Tart Cherry Berliner Weisse: 7.5.
• Martin House’s Stars Above: 7.5.
• Odd Muse Brewing Company’s Opulence (We Has It): 7.5
• Noble Rey Brewing Company’s Frooty Tang: 7.5.
• Martin House Brewing’s Pretzel Stout: 7.5.
• Grapevine’s Prickly Pear Wheat Ale: 7.5.
• Texas Ale Project’s Good To Go: 7.5.
• Bitter Sisters’ Knock Out: 7.5.
• Four Corners’ Notorious O.A.T.: 7.5.
• Noble Rey Golden Rey With Raspberries and Ginger: 7.5.
• On Rotation Saved By The Belma: 7.5.
• True Vine’s Unicorn’s Revenge: 7.5.
• Four Bullets Brewery’s Royal Flush: 7.5.
• Deep Ellum’s Hop Seeker: 7.5.
• Four Corners’ El Super Bee: 7.5.
• TUPPS’ Full Grown Jack: 7.5.
• Lakewood’s Hopochondria: 7.5.
• Three Nations GPA: 7.5.
• Martin House’s Rubberneck Red: 7.5.
• Lakewood’s Antigoon’s Revenge: 7.5.
• Community’s Texas Pils: 7.5.
• Lakewood’s Zomer Pils: 7.5.
• Cedar Creek’s Dankosaurus: 7.5.
• Cedar Creek Brewery Clover Kicker: 7.25.
• Noble Rey Sex In A Canoe: 7.25.
• Legal Draft Beer Company Free & Clear: 7.25.
• Oak Highlands Brewery’s Oktoberfest.: 7.25.
• Wild Acre Brewing Company’s Snap’D: 7.
• Noble Rey’s European Vacation: 7
• Unlawful Assembly’s Public Dissent: 7.
• Deep Ellum Rye Pils: 7.
• Union Bear’s Amber Red Ale: 7.
• Turning Point Beer’s Silent Treatment: 7.
• Wild Acre Brewing Company’s Ranch Style: 7.
• 3 Nations Mango SMASH IPA: 7.
• Legal Draft Chief Justice Stout: 7.
• Texas Ale Project’s Pantera Golden Ale: 7.
• Legal Draft’s Black Letter Law: 7.
• Noble Rey Brewing Company’s Mother Night: 7.
• TUPPS Brewery’s Imperial Saison: 7.
• Manhattan Project’s Plutonium-239: 7.
• Panther Island Brewing’s Sweet Fang: 7.
• Backcountry’s Texas IPA: 7.
• Shannon Brewing Co.’s Lucha Libre Mexican Lager: 7.
• Backcountry’s Double IPA: 7.
• Wild Acre Brewing Company’s Billy Jenkins: 7.
• Pegasus City Brewery’s Great Hall Hefe: 7.
• Rahr’s Visionary: 7.
• Shannon Brewing’s Irish Cream Ale: 7.
• Oak Highlands’ Guava Good: 7.
• TUPPS Brewery’ Northbound 75: 7.
• Rahr & Sons’ Iron Joe: 7.
• BrainDead’s I Like Harvey IPA: 7.
• Martin House’s Turtle Power: 7.
• Three Nations Brewing Co.’s Texas Gold Chili Lime: 7.
• Collective’s Petite Golden Sour: 7.
• Shannon’s Chocolate Stout: 7.
• Trinity Forest Brewing Company’s Blonde Ale: 7.
• BrainDead’s Red Ale: 7.
• Community’s Razzy Raspberry Witbier: 7.
• Martin House’s Gateway Blonde Ale: 7.
• Bearded Eel’s Purple Unicorn: 7.
• Noble Rey’s Off The Leash: 7.
• Shannon Brewing Company’s Irish Red: 7.
• Texas Ale Project’s Somethin’ Shady: 7.
• Deep Ellum IPA: 7.
• Cedar Creek’s The Lawn Ranger: 7.
• Martin House Brewing Company’s Cellarman’s Reserve IPA (Amarillo).: 7.
• Lakewood’s Till & Toil: 7.
• Armadillo Ale Works’ Town Squared: 7.
• 903 Brewers’ The Chosen One: 7.
• 903 Brewers’ Sugar On Top: 7.
• Martin House’s Gateway XPA: 7.
• Armadillo Ale Work’s Quakertown Stout: 7.
• Revolver’s High Brass: 7.
• Community’s Pale Ale: 7.
• Oak Highlands’ Chump Change: 7.
• Shanning Brewing Co.’s Mór IPA: 7.
• Martin House’s River House: 7.
• Grapevine Craft Brewery’s Sir William’s Brown Ale: 7.
• Community’s Funnel Cake Ale: 7.
• Audacity’s Boss Raptor IPA: 7.
• Texas Ale Project’s Hawaiian Roadrunner: 6.75.
• Whistle Post’s Shoofly Coconut Lime Ale: 6.75.
• Community Brewing Company’s Silly Gose: 6.75
• HopFusion Ale Works’ Feisty Blonde: 6.75
• Martin House’s Queen of the Mist (Prickly Pear): 6.75.
• Armadillo Ale Works Land Yacht IPA: 6.5
• Three Nations Texas Xmas Hazelnut Ale: 6.5.
• Martin House’s The Juice: 6.5.
• Collective Brewing Project’s Mom Azacca: 6.5.
• Four Corners’ La Lechuza: 6.5.
• Revolver’s Ironhead IPA: 6.5.
• 903 Brewers’ Trot Line: 6.5.
• Four Corners’ Celebración: 6.5.
• Peticolas’ Operation Collaboration: 6.5.
• Rahr & Sons Brewing Company’s Pumpkin Ale: 6.5.
• Grapevine Craft Brewery’s Nightwatch: 6.5.
• Peticolas’ The Duke: 6.5.
• Deep Ellum’s Double Brown Stout : 6.5.
• Cedar Creek’s Maui Wowie: 6.25.
• On Rotation’s Mexican Barleywine: 6.25.
• Thirsty Bro Brewing Co.’s Sweet Cherry Blonde: 6
• On Rotation’s Darjeeling Tea Session Ale: 6.
• Wild Acre’s Tarantula Hawk: 6.
• Martin House’s Kafkaesque: 6.
• TUPPS’ Cotton Mill Gold: 6.
• Martin House’s Melted: Salted Caramel & Waffle Cone Ice Cream Ale: 6.
• Brutal Beerworks’ Mother Heffer: 6.
• Four Bullets’ All In IPA: 6.
• Rabbit Hole’s Tweedleyum: 6.
• Rabbit Hole’s Off With Your Red: 6.
• Legal Draft’s Legal Holiday: 6.
• Rahr & Sons’ Angry Santa: 6.
• Cedar Creek’s Elliott’s Phoned Home Pale Ale: 6
• Grapevine Craft Brewery’s Lakefire: 6
• Armadillo Ale Works’ WunderMelon: 6
• Cobra Brewing Company’s Dawn of the Dank: 6
• Deep Ellum Pale Ale: 6
• Lakewood’s Troll Toll: 5.5.
• Martin House’s Hell Below: 5.5.
• Lakewood’s La Dame Du Lac: 5.5.
• Martin House’s Best Maid Sour Pickle Beer: 5.
• TUPPS Brewery’s Imperial Pastry Sour Ale: 5.
• Woodcreek’s Lakeside Cerveza: 5.
• Legal Draft Beer Company’s Smash & Grab IPA: 5.
• Martin House Cuvee Pumpkin Latte: 5.
• Intrinsic’s Crunktoberfest: 5.
• Martin House’s Mind On My Money: 5.
• 903 Brewers’ The Land Of Milk And Honey: 5.
• Deep Ellum’s Numb Comfort: 5.
• TUPPS’ Day Off: 4.75.
• 3 Nations’ Lady Luck Horchata Ale: 4.5.
• Four Bullets’ Black Jack Brown: 4.5.
• Audacity’s Checkered Past: 4.
• Four Corners Heart O’ Texas: 4.
• Audacity’s Sunset Boulevard: 4.
• Bitter Sisters’ Hot Temper: 4.
• Shannon Brewing Company’s IPA: 4.
• Grapevine’s Monarch: 4.
• TUPPS’ Cotton Candy Shandy: 4.
• Good Neighbor Brews’ Slim Sweetness: 3.
• Good Neighbor Brews’ O’Carrol’s Irish Red: 3.
• Twin Peaks’ Dirty Blonde: 3.
• Franconia Wheat: 3.
• 903 Brewers’ Mythical Creatures: 2.5.
• Miller Lite: 1.