Quack, Quack, Quack.
Thanks to Monday's Memorial Day holiday, it looks like it's going to be a long weekend for most of us.
And, if you and yours are anything like us and ours, you'll probably spend the extra day off day-drinking — responsibly, of course.
In advance of all that raging, you might want to watch this video heading into the weekend's binging, as it contains all kinds of ways to MacGyver off the lids of beer bottles when you've misplaced your bottle opener. And you may also want to keep the following list handy as well, as it's got the lowdown on all the weekend's best haps.
Kick ass out there, everyone.
Friday
Lil Boosie at Icon
At least two Dallas-area promoters were swindled in their efforts to bring the recently-freed-from-prison Louisiana rapper Lil Boosie to town for his first free-from-jail show, losing some $25,000 in the process each. But one guesses the crew at Icon wasn't one of those promoters. Or were they? I can tell you one easy way to find out! — Pete Freedman
OFF! at Dada
Keith Morris doesn't really owe anything to anyone at this point. The legendary hardcore frontman — previously famous for being a founding member of Black Flag and the Circle Jerks and currently the frontman for the don't-call-us-a-supergroup outfit OFF! — has long paid his dues. That doesn't mean his band is resting on its laurels, though: When OFF! is onstage tonight performing its fast, loud, heavy — and mostly under-two-minutes long — songs, it'll do so with a fervor expected of a band some 30 years these performers' junior. Cerebral Ballzy and Nasa Space Universe open. — PF
Black Label Society at Verizon Theatre
Last fall, former Pantera frontman Phil Anselmo briefly set the metal world ablaze when he briefly floated the idea of a Pantera reunion in which Ozzy Osbourne guitarist Zakk Wylde would step in for the ten-years-deceased Dimebag Darrell. While that will probably never ever come to fruition — thanks a lot, Vinnie Paul! — Wylde's Black Label Society and Anselmo's supergroup Down will share space on this bill. Devil You Know and Butcher Babies also perform. — Cory Graves
Looking for Jonny: The Legend of Jonny Thunders at Texas Theatre
To the New Orleans police department, New York Dolls founder Jonny Thunders was just another junkie. And while Thunders had been long struggling to kick his heroin habit up until his death in 1991 at the age of 38, there were many close to the musician who disagreed with the authorities' ruling that he died of drug-related causes. In their defense, there were some pretty suspicious circumstances surrounding his death, including the unnatural position of his body and the fact that he was robbed of several possessions, among them a huge supply of methadone. In this new documentary, Danny Garcia, who also helmed The Rise and Fall of the Clash, examines the life and mysterious death of the enigmatic Jonny Thunders. Garcia will be on hand to answer questions after tonight's screening, too. — CG
Crowne Plaza Invitational at Colonial Country Club
Yesterday was a tough opening round for Adam Scott, who was making his debut as the No. 1 golfer in the World Golf Rankings, and who is currently six shots behind tournament leader Dustin Johnson. In any case, he's got a long weekend ahead if he's got designs on wearing the plaid jacket on Sunday. — CG
Eagulls at Three Links
We've got to address the open letter. Have to. Because, prior to the March release of this post-punk English outfit's stellar, self-titled debut LP, that's what most people knew the band for. It was a rallying cry for realness in music — and a slam aimed at those other bands out there whose “MUMS AND DADS THAT PAY FOR YOU TO 'DO THE BAND FULL TIME” and “WHO TAKE DRUGS YET HAVE NEVER MET A DRUG DEALER” and aren't living the struggle like this band is. It's amazing, and you should read it in full here, even if the band's trying to distance itself from it these days. The fact that the band's music is scuzzy, loud and generally awesome helps. Twin Peaks and Sealion open. — Pete Freedman
Ten Hands at Dan's Silverleaf
Although they fell off in popularity close to two decades ago, the Paul Slavens-led Ten Hands managed to accomplish quite a bit in the late '80s and early '90s to long cement its status as local legends. The band will look to placate nostalgic fans with this reunion performance. — Porttia Portis
Rockla-Hometown at RBC
Friday starts of three days of music at the recently reopened Commerce Street venue. See Form of Truth, The Buffalo Parade, Long Sword Spectacular and Church Loves Devil each perform at the Day One festivities. Doors open at 7 p.m. and $10 gets you in for all three days. — PP
Johnette Napolitano at Kessler Theater
In a recent interview with the Observer, Johnette Napolitano said that, if she never played an electric guitar again, it'd be too soon. It's not that she's got anything against the instrument or against her years playing it with Concrete Blonde, she just wants to put her focus elsewhere — like on her vocals, and, potentially, getting into film. Her ultimate goal is to just get people to shut up and listen, focusing on her voice and art for what it is now, instead of trying to re-live the past. Maybe more musicians should take this advice later in their careers; they might have as much fun as she's having. Watch for local musician Jimmy Menkena — whose band previously toured with Concrete Blonde — to join Napolitano on stage for a song tonight. Madison King opens. — PP
Paul Wall at The Prophet Bar
If you're anything like us, you've probably wondered at some point what happened to Paul Wall? It seemed as if he fell into obscurity almost as fast as he rose to the mainstream. Hey, that's just the nature of the music business as we've come to know it. As it turns out, though, Paul Wall turned down major label deals to create his own independent label, Paul Wall Music, with the help of friend and fellow Houston rapper, Slim Thug. These days he's developing his label's own music style and fan base, taking things back to basics via the underground — or so he says. And if you're interested, after this show, you can also catch Wall at Monroe Lounge for the official after party with special guest Dustin Cavazos. — PP
Heart Byrne at Granada Theater
According to the Granada's website, this Austin-based Talking Heads tribute act goes good with Talking Heads, David Byrne and the '80s. Go figure. Dallas oddball George Quartz opens. — CG
Lady Gaga Party at Candleroom
Up to this point, private Dallas club the Candleroom has managed to keep things uber classy by keeping out all the riff raff known colloquially as the general public. Starting with tonight's Lady Gaga-themed party, though, they'll open their upscale doors to anyone who wants to come in, members or not. Just keep in mind they do have a strictly enforced dress code. Unlike some other places in town, though, theirs is not only clearly posted on their website, but it applies to absolutely everyone. — CG
Super Freestyle Explosion at Dallas County Convention Center Arena
This thing might be worth going to just to see Nu Shooz perform “I Can't Wait.” Lisa Lisa, Expose, Trinere, Stacy Q, Shannon, Debbie Deb, Stevie B., Cynthia and Johnny O. will also each perform one song you know and a handful that sound vaguely familiar. — CG
Bad Veins at The Prophet Bar
If you're looking for that median indie pop sound between The Killers's glam and Death Cab For Cutie's melancholy, then Cincinnati dance pop duo Bad Veins should really hit the spot. That's to say you're not going to get too much depth with the band's music, no. Its songs are simply damn catchy and something you might dance around in your living room to. Just don't expect more than that. — PP
Brutal Juice and Baboon at Rubber Gloves
No, this isn't some leftover listing from 1991 — we checked. Rather, it's just a couple of legacy bands that have since been immortalized as villains in Toadies drummer Mark Reznicek's comic book series getting together in their old stopping grounds. Curvette and Cornhole open. — CG
Saturday
Skid Row at Trees
Oh, hey! It's those guys who wore tight leather pants on stages the '80s! And they've got a new EP to promote! They don't have Sebastian Bach on vocals any longer, though. He's long since left the band. — Ashley Gongora
Miss Marcy and Her Texas SugarDaddies at Twilite Lounge
Expect a night filled with contemporary jazz, plus a taste of what the 20's and 30's could have sounded like. Also? Expect some Denton shoutouts: Marcy is an alumnus of the University of North Texas. — AG
French Horn Rebellion at The Foundry (Free)
These classically trained french horn- and bassoon-playing brothers previously played with the Chicago Civic Orchestra — before telling the conductor that they were going to peace out and start making hot beats instead. Chicago disco-rockers Hey Champ co-headline this one. — CG
UltraViolet Rock Show and Art Auction for CF at Dada
Each year, Cystic Fibrosis takes over the life of countless Americans, including adorable young Dallasite Violet Dixon, who was diagnosed with the disease in 2006. For the past few years, Violet's local rocker parents have been raising funds to help find a cure for the disease with, among other things, rock concerts. This one will feature performances from the likes of Catamaran, Jenny Kirtland, Coupleskate, Pete Bush, The Tolpuddle Martyrs, Family Crude and High Seas Drifters. — CG
A Gentleman's Agreement: A Night for Men at Studio 410
News flash, fellas: There's absolutely nothing wrong with getting one's self professionally groomed every now and then. Treat yo self to a straight razor shave and manicure at Studio 410 at this one. It's just good hygiene. — CG
Wingstock at Buffalo Brothers
Fort Worth's Buffalo Brothers kicks off its yearly Wingstock deal on Saturday. The event includes the fifth annual wing eating contest, the first annual wing sauce contest and three days of live music from local artists like The Longshots, Hanna Barbarians and Un Chien. — PP
On the Waterfront at Klyde Warren Park
As a part of the Classics at Klyde Warren film series, the park will be screening the 1954 film On the Waterfront starring Marlon Brando. The film is an American crime drama about union violence and corruption, which received eight out of the 12 Academy Awards it was nominated for, including best motion picture and best actor. So, yeah, pretty good stuff. — PP
Thai Culture and Food Festival at Buddhist Center of Dallas
The Thai Community Center of North Texas is throwing its first Thai Culture & Food Festival. The two-day event will be filled with authentic Thai cuisine, cultural performances, dances, music, Muy Thai and more. It's got free admission and open to everyone, so get your fill of all things Thai. Proceeds from the event will go to support the TCCNT and the Buddhist Center of Dallas. — PP
Radfest at Panther Island Pavilion
Radfest is the first installment of what's planned to be an annual showcase of DFW artists, food, music and (mostly) local bands. There will be live performances from A.Dd+, The Tontons, The Orbans, Dustin Cavazos, Sam Lao, Chudi and B. Anderson at this one. Doors open at 5 pm with tickets for $10 online in advance and $15 at the door. — PP
The Cadillac Three at Billy Bob's
Hard-rocking Nashville country trio The Cadillac Three has only released one album, but the band has already turned in a duet with schlocky pop country superstars Florida Georgia Line and appeared in an episode of ABC's Nashville that saw the outfit damn near signing to Rayna James' Highway 65 label. Tonight, the band will play two distinct types of songs out in the stockyards: The half where they tell you where they're from (“The South,” “I'm Southern,” “Tennessee Mojo”), and the ones where they tell you what to do (“Back It Up,” “Get Your Buzz On,” “Turn It On”). — CG
The Winery Dogs at Granada Theater
Radio spots advertising this show have been pretty heavily driving the point home that The Winery Dogs is a quote-unquote supergroup. Real talk, though: To how many people are Richi Kotzen, Billy Sheehan and Mike Portnoy household names? Sure, Kotzen was a member of Poison for awhile, Sheehan was in Mr. Big, and, most impressively, Portnoy co-founded Dream Theater. But does that make them super enough to command $30 to $50 for tickets to this one? Sure does. — CG
A-Trak at Avenu Lounge
Avenu Lounge presents an intimate live performance from world-renowned DJ/producer A-Trak of Duck Sauce. The event is expected to sell out, as there are limited tickets, so get yours while you can. — PP
Holly Golightly at Three Links
And I said, “What about Breakfast at Tiffany's?” She said, “Um, no, actually I'm an English rockabilly singer,” before adding, “but I think I remember the film.” — CG
Deep Ellum Windows on Elm Street
This art project amounts to a set of six solo exhibitions that focus on vacant spaces in Deep Ellum by showcasing art pieces in their windows. Christopher Blay, Sally Glass, Nathan Green, Hannah Hudson, Gregory Ruppe, and H Schenck are the participants in this final installment of this series. — PP
Escape the Fate at The Prophet Bar
The wounds for Escape the Fate are still fresh after the recent announcement from now former-bassist Max Green that he was leaving the band. Now, drummer Robert Ortiz is the last of the band's remaining original members. Let's hope they can use all of the angst and tension created from the recent band fracture to their advantage at this one, by channeling all of the darkness and emo vibes that made the band who they are in the first place. — PP
Rockla-Hometown at RBC
Day Two of this three-day fest keeps things rolling with performances from Public Love Affair, Stelae, 26 Locks, Protisnaut, Mel Stock and Joel Derusha. — CG
DJ Tony Touch at SISU Uptown Resort
Tony Touch, a.k.a. Tony Toca, is one of hip hop's most recognized DJs. He's worked with everyone from Cypress Hill to Eminem, and has been featured on shows such as Saturday Night Live and The Dave Chappelle Show. He's an icon in hip-hop and the urban Hispanic genre for the way he's revolutionized the DJ game with his talent on the 1's and 2's. Keep in mind: This is a 21 and up event, with pool attire required and strictly enforced. — PP
Sunday
Saint Vitus at Three Links
Since the 1970s, Saint Vitus has been regarded as being one of the front-runners of the doom metal genre. These days, they're back together — with a slightly new lineup, at least — for a 35th anniversary tour of Born Too Late, which they'll play here in its entirety. — PP
Margarita Meltdown at Bishop Arts
There are few things in this world that quite compare to the feeling you get after sipping your first margarita. That instant rush of sweetness, countered with that zing of sour offered by a freshly squeezed lime, all surrounded by a ring of salt? It's a mind-blowing and an insanely flavorful drink — let alone the fact that it's literally an intoxicating one — and, each time, without fail, it makes you long for a little alone time on a lounge chair lined up along some secluded beach. Funny, then, that both the the O.G. and frozen incarnations of the drink were both invented right here in this landlocked city of ours. Well, at least we get to reap the benefits of those local origins. On Sunday afternoon, the Bishop Arts District will host the fourth annual Margarita Meltdown Festival, which will find more than 30 area restaurants and bars — among them La Calle Doce, Oak Cliff Social Club, Whiskey Cake, Komali, and The Cedars Social — offering up their own takes on the classic concoction and competing for the title of Dallas' best margarita. — Erika Lambreton
Journey and Steve Miller Band at Gexa Energy Pavilion
Noted Woodrow Wilson High School product Steve Miller — and his eponymous band — turns up at Gexa tonight for set sure to be chock-full of hits. Hell, Miller's penned more than his share in his day. And he's going on 71, so you may not have many more opportunities to hear “The Joker” or “Take the Money and Run” live. And, hey, you really should. Because they're both great. Also, some band called Journey is on the bill. — Stephen Young
Good Timin' Sunday Pre-Memorial Day Party at Double Wide
Put a nightcap on your Sunday Funday in honor of the fact that, like most red-blooded Americans, you probably have Memorial Day Monday off tomorrow. The D-Wide is throwing one of its famous parking lot parties in honor of the occasion. This one will feature Stevie James & The Blue Flames playing good-timing music on an outdoor stage, plus free barbecue while it lasts and $3 you-call-its. — CG
Brew-B-Q at Deep Ellum Brewing Co.
For its fourth annual food and brews fest, the DEBC folks are doing things big and shutting down the block in front of the brewery. That'll allow them to pack in more food and food-lovers alike. They do ask that you leave the pups at home this year, though. — CG
Rockla-Hometown at RBC
This three-day fest wraps up with performances from Betray the Dreamer, Loss Leaders, Spectra and The Moonwaves. — CG
Sunday Session at Dada
To celebrate memorial day weekend, Dada is hosting a special daytime party with guest DJ Rich Medina, as well as sets from JT Donaldson, Tony Schwa, Tyrone Smiley, Jay Clipp and Luke Sardello, plus live painting from the Sour Grapes crew. Head's up: This one starts at 2 p.m. — PP
Sick Individuals at SISU Uptown Resort
From The Netherlands' big room house scene, Sick Individuals have quickly made a name for themselves with their original releases, remixes and live shows. — PP
Monday
Memorial Day Staycation at Fraternal Order of Eagles
You got the day off, but you don't want to go out of town or make any special plans. And why should you when the Dallas Fraternal Order of Eagles has cheap beer, dollar jello shots and a great pool? Not to mention, this is your best bet of the long weekend to see beaucoups of Dallas' most tattooed individuals. — PP
Dallas Ciclovia
Whether you plan on attending Dallas' first large-scale Ciclovia event or not, you might want check the link above just the same to find out the list of roads that'll be closed for this giant, bike-friendly, car-free activity fest. — CG
To find out what else is going on today, this week and beyond, check out our events page.