Schooled.

How To Avoid Your Residential Advisor (and Other Undesirables).

It's about that time of year when our youngest readers' summer days are numbered and their minds start to wander toward what the new school year might bring. To help these bright young minds acclimate, we've put together a handy, five-part guide to help them prep for their return to academia — but in somewhat of a different light. You won't find stories about the importance of extracurriculars or anything like that here; instead, we'll just be providing insight into the real concerns of the typical college student. Hopefully, it'll be helpful — and not just to the readers enrolled in school. Hey, sometimes we all need a refresher course.

Now that you're in school, you'll start to realize that there are all sorts of people that you will be forced on occasion to interact with — school administrators, teaching assistants and occasionally members of the Student Government, if you're really unlucky.

One of the worst cases of forced-interaction is the impossibly peppy, maniacally over-eager Residential Advisor.

When you move into your new dorm room, you'll have to meet up with the RA multiple times to make sure that everything is going swell.

These meetings are hard to avoid, since a lot of times, instead of scheduling them, the RA just shows up right at your door.

If this happens to you, do not invite them in. That only encourages future visits.

Just act like you're in the middle of something really important.

“Oh no!” you can tell them. “I just got a call that my chem lab experiment has gone horribly wrong! Mutant rats are everywhere! We must save the children!”

Or just tell them you were about to heard out the door on your way to work: “Gotta make some dough today at the bread factory, if you know what I mean!”

There might be occasions where your RA invites you to his or her room for pizza, which might sound like a good idea at the time, but I swear it's a trap. No amount of pizza can make up for the awkward conversation that is bound to happen.

Pre-prepare yourself with an excuse, and never respond to the question “Do you like pizza?” because that is also a trap.

Everybody likes pizza, and your RA knows this.

As for other people you might not want to spend time with in college, like, say, that guy in your chem lab who keeps doing all of the rat experiments, it's best to act like you're always very busy. Keep a fake planner and fill it up with pretend events (or real events, I suppose, if you're into that sort of thing). Politely decline future invites.

If you get stuck with someone awful during a group project, just divide the work and do it separately.

You can't completely avoid some people. But you can always find a way to keep interaction at a minimum.

There are a lot of people in college, so hopefully you can set it up so that you mostly only spend time with those that you want to spend time with (like that rat you will be experimenting on later, for instance).

See also: Your Dorm Room Doesn't Have to Look Like an Ikea Catalog.

See also: Is That Microwavable?

See also: How to Pull an All-Nighter.

See also: How to Eat Your Roommates' Food Without Them Noticing.